My dearest little one,
We have waited in such anxious expectation for your arrival. We’ve cleaned, sorted, organized, washed, folded, rearranged and done everything we can possibly think of to prepare our home for your arrival. We’ve even tried to prepare your brother, but the jury’s still out on how well that preparation actually worked.
Now that your arrival is imminent – in the sense that yesterday was your due date, not that I’m in labor with you now – I am writing this letter to you to let you know just how ready we truly are for you.
We made one of the most exciting decisions about you when you were still only weeks gestated – we decided not to find out if you are a boy or a girl until the day you arrive. Since we made that decision I’ve had countless dreams of forgetting to even check, but your dad tells me that’s impossible and that it won’t happen.
In an effort to assure you that we are prepared, I’ve been practicing visualizing your birth – to let you know that I am ready when you are because I am not afraid of labor at all. Sometimes I visualize you with a full head of curly black hair, sometimes it’s curly red hair and sometimes you’re bald. I’ve visualized you as a boy and as a girl about an equal number of times. I’ve imagined a water birth, using the birth stool, even using a rebozo even though I don’t think my midwife has one… I just want you to know, I’m ready.
I’m ready to look into your eyes and fall in love.
I’m already more than half in love with you, just from the past nine months that you’ve spent growing in me. Your kicks and pokes and prods are different from the ones I felt with your brother, just as I know that you will be different – whether you are a boy or a girl – from your brother.
Being a mother is overwhelming.
It is the very best, most precious gift that I have ever been given – that opportunity to be a mother. I’ve learned so much from the past three years with your brother. I know I will learn so much more from you, too.
No matter how you look or who you grow up to be, I want you to know that I love you and I will always love you. You are my baby, my precious, my dear sweet little one. I am privileged to be able to call myself your mother.
I know that we won’t always have the best days – your brother is just like me in personality, and we clash often. I know it’s inevitable that you and I will have those days too. But even on those days, I truly value being your mother – it is the most awesome gift I’ve ever received.
I am not a perfect mother, I have many flaws.
I want you to know that I will always try to do what is best for you, that my goal is to be the best mother I can be for you and your brother. Be prepared to hate what I do sometimes, but know that I always have your best interests in mind. Even when your dad and I tell you that no, you can’t go to that totally kickin’ party at your friend’s house. We weren’t born yesterday, you know.
We can’t wait to welcome you into the world, into our arms and to finally know your name. We’ve been waiting for you, and we hope to see you soon.
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